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Happy new years to everyone, today is January 1st, 2018. This month I have decided to try out a month-long writing challenge. I have 31 days’ worth of topics and questions, and each day I will be posting something new. I hope you enjoy this month of reading and that we can step into the new year together!

To kick off the first day, the topic is “My Current Relationship.” Well sit back and relax because this will be something I could talk about for days.

Now I have to be honest right from the start, I guess you could say I am in a relationship but also, I’m not. Bear with me as I get quite awkward and nervous when talking about someone I love, especially as I know they will be reading this, but hey! “Let’s make January a month of just saying things” (quote by him). 😉

Here we go! June 2017, I followed one of those big quote accounts, and never pay much attention to them, until one night. This boy who seemed similar in age posted on his quote account and put up his snapchat and in this brief moment of confidence I decided, why not and added him. For a couple days, I didn’t think much of it, I didn’t want to seem like a crazy fan girl or just another person. If I am to talk to someone, I want to leave an impression even if it’s simple and kind. The day before my math exam, the last exam before summer, I decided to pull up my phone and wish him a great summer. I mean he seemed like someone I just had to get to know or at least just say hi. To my surprised he replied!

We were both at similar times in our lives, we were both going into senior year and things weren’t exactly looking up for either of us. We eventually began talking ever so slightly, until one evening when I hit a low. Ever so late into the night, with a time difference of 3 hours he called to make sure I was okay. This was surprising to me, to be fair nobody has felt that strongly about checking up on me.

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That night we talked for hours, and it was the first time I had ever been able to be myself that quickly around someone. He and I laughed at the same jokes nobody ever understood or found funny, we started to share music, talked about our favourite foods (pickles ofcourse), the best christmas hallmark movies, along with talking about poetry endlessly. “It’s like that one quote…” he would say at least five times a night. We quickly became friends and facetiming each night became a routine.

A couple months pasts, and I must say by then I had caught feelings. In my mind I though how could this be happening, this is just going to hurt in the end, but one night on August ninth we shared three words that filled my heart.

Now I’m not going to go completely into everything or else you’d be reading a 10 page essay, but let me get this straight, from day one I knew this boy would be someone special. There has always been this piece of him that is captivating and intriguing, unlike others, he was the first real person I’ve ever talked too. His thoughts are authentic, the way he talked about things were so honest and true. There was a connection between us, something I never have and will find with someone else.

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Moving along, 6 months later and my love for him has continued to grow day by day. He is my best friend and holds my heart. I love him more than I can verbally express. It is January, and I have already applied to universities in the city where I intend to carry out my future with him. We have 6 more months to go until we are graduated and set free.

Call me crazy, but one day you will see our life unfold together. He has taught me what real love and friendship is, we share values and know eachothers worth, and we continue to excel in our communication. So back to the first question, “describe my relationship.” Well my heart is taken by a boy who lives 2,987.5 miles away from me, and we are stronger than ever, and I wouldn’t be where I am today without him. I must say, I am so thankful I wished him a great summer, but I am even more thankful he responded!

Happy New Year’s!

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Her Goodbye

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I’m way too good at goodbyes

Not good enough at hellos

Too sad to care

Too happy for despair

I am who I am

You can’t change that

But that one person

They fill the void

They take away the hurt

They bring love

When they leave it hurts twice as much.

-Alecxi 15, Colorado

Imagine This

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Imagine

waking up

and feeling your heart breaking

before you’ve even gotten up

Imagine

having a constant feeling of dread

in the pit of your stomach

that’s always weighing you down

Imagine

watching everyone else

smiling, laughing, enjoying themselves

while you struggle to maintain a fake optimism

Imagine

feeling permanently exhausted

completely drained

of energy and hope

Imagine

feeling like you’re drowning

while everyone else walks around you

carefree and oblivious

to your pain

Imagine

feeling so terribly lonely

that you don’t even

want to be with yourself anymore

Imagine

being in so much pain

that you want to scream

and break things and hit your head against the wall

until you can’t remember anything anymore

Imagine

living this nightmare

every day

every night…

welcome to my life.

 

Julia 17 Alb, CAN